There’s A Reason Why I Don’t Own A Spaceship

Guys, we have it easy. I’m definitely not the best player out there, in fact I suck. But I get by.
Back in the days though! There was no mercy! No mercy!!

I’ll explain my rage in a bit, for now, lets have a little gander at R-type!

So first off, the visuals are stunning. There’s absolutely no laziness in the art, especially within the limits that was given; if anything the limits were pushed. For a simple concept of a game, the background art does well to keep a steady flow of entertainment and atmosphere, and expanding the world as the spaceship goes deeper into the level. The colors do well to differentiate enemies and color of fire from both enemy and spaceship. The color also adds life to each individual which pop out of their 2D constraints.
Enemies are unpredictable from where they will enter the screen, keeping players on their toes. And they don’t always follow in a straight line, as some will come in a scattered group. The game tries to use as much space as it can, placing enemies on the bottom as well, which means more to aim, fire and dodge.
The upgrades in this game are awesome! Each type of weapon upgrade has its own way of firing and effect. Like the charge up ones, and the beams that bounce off everywhere and missiles flying at different directions! What I also like is the manner in wish the ship upgrades. The upgrades attaches itself to the ship in a magnetic way, extending it in a really nice shape.

So I also found a link where you can play the first two levels of R-type:

And this is where my rage comes into.
I can only go so far in the first level, the FIRST! The game is so different from just watching it and playing it, honestly, I didn’t think it was gonna be that challenging! Like I said, I’m not a fantabulous player, but nor is R-Type a fantabulous friend. The unpredictable enemies? They really mess you over, especially because they shoot unpredictably too. You know what they do? They shoot you in the back once you think they’re gone! Yeah, space isn’t a nice place to be in you guys! Don’t go there! If your parents are thinking about moving to space, call the police! That thought right there is inducing child abuse and totally encouraging bullying.
Clearly you have to play this game at least a thousand times before you know what the hell is going on…
The ship is so fragile, I was a bigger threat to myself than the enemy because I’d go too close to the ground and hit it and die! The spaceship doesn’t even endure a few scratches, it just plays the amateur dramatics card straight up! Kaboom! “Owww my engines been hit!” Man up and grow a pair Arrowhead!
I guess in my defense for being a crappy player is that I’m not used to playing on a pc. No joke, I’m struggling badly on Super Meat Boy because I’m too lazy to hook up a controller to the game… I’d suck at that too, but not as much…


Scrolling Along

You might be thinking, “Gee that looks a lot like Gradius!” First off, since when do you say ‘gee’? and second, it sort of is! Parodius is a parody of the game Gradius, it has the same mechanics and features but with silly characters and references to Japanese culture, sexy bosses and accompanied by classical music. Now you might say “Why blog about Parodius instead of Gradius?” Well, because of it being a parody, there are differences in some interactions, that are also added, the environment and other features that keep the player entertained.
First off, as any typical side-scrolling shooter does, the ship has many upgrades that supports the player as they defeat the incoming enemies. With Parodius having different silly characters to choose from, each have their own style of upgrade. As seen as with the octopus, when upgraded he shoots out bubbles!
Much like Gradius, the player can maneuver past obstacles going up or down through different sections of the level. This adds a little variety to something that seems to be going only one way. The player also shoots through obstacles to make way.
Parodius has a bell that occasionally enters the scene which the player can shoot. Shooting it enough times changes the color and depending on the color will effect how it benefits the player when they collect it:
Red- More points
Green- The player and it’s mini helpers will grow and be granted invincibility for limited time.
White- Turn into a paper megaphone that shouts out phrases and Einsteins equation… which deals out more damage

I really like the environments and crazy themes in this game, and gives me something to reflect on with my own work as it’s not set in a typical outer space scene. And the music really adds to the energy and chaotic surrounding, so the player has no reason to feel bored, but is at risk for getting distracted.